Gospel Friends

Over the last several months I’ve had several conversations with several friends who are struggling with anger. Some of them realize how angry they are and some of them don’t but the common thread that runs through their situations is that they have been deeply hurt by someone they love.  My heart breaks for my dear friends and I long for their healing.

As I have prayed for them and for wisdom to know how to encourage them and bear with them in their struggle God has graciously showed me that what they (and I) need when struggling with anger is not law – what we should be doing, but the Gospel –all that God has done for us through Christ. I don’t know about you but I’ve never been able to get over being angry with someone by telling myself to STOP being angry or by blaming the other person for my anger or by pretending I’m not angry. 

I know that healing comes when we live in the light of the whole Gospel. When God opens our hearts, we see

·         Just how much He loves us, how good and gracious He is

·         Just how sinful (prideful, self-righteous and demanding) we are

·         That He sympathizes with our weaknesses and understands our pain

·         That either Christ died for that sin that was committed against us because that person is a child of God or that sin will be avenged by the justice of God because she isn’t a child of God

·         That the bonds of sin have been broken by the death of Christ so we do not have to go on sinning – that is go on being angry

·         That He is sovereign and rules over all so this situation isn’t out of His control but He has orchestrated it for our good and His glory

Seeing Jesus and His glorious work is the only power strong enough to transform our anger but how do you articulate these truths of the Gospel to someone who is hurting? How do you love a friend so that she understands you sympathize with her pain and anger but you won’t let her wallow in it? How can we be Gospel Friends?

Oh Heavenly Father, may we be so rooted and grounded in your love that the Gospel- all that you have done for us through Christ, flows freely in our conversations. Teach us how to be Gospel friends proclaiming your love, grace and mercy to one another every day so that when we are blind to our sins (and we will be) we are instruments of righteousness in each other’s lives.